We often think that Christmas is a joyful time when families come together, share meals, laugh, and celebrate this special time of the year. On the internet and on television, we can see many pictures and images of families gathered around a table, people running their Christmas shopping, parties, and laughter filling the air.
But for many people, Christmas can be a challenging time, highlighting loss, loneliness, or unfulfilled hopes. It’s far from the images that we see in the media. For too many people, this time brings feelings of anxiety, fear, and distress rather than real joy.
The overall pressure to join and engage in festive activities, such as Christmas Parties or games, carries emotional weight and forces many people to be falsely positive about them. Many people worry they might miss out on future opportunities if they don’t join in. Others feel pressure to meet the group’s expectations.
That can become a source of stress for those struggling, making the season even harder to navigate. Pressure to not ruin other people’s happiness forced us to be falsely positive about the upcoming season.
This emotional weight can affect other areas of their lives, including their daily work and interactions at work.
Why isn’t Christmas a happy time for everyone?
1. Not everyone is staying over Christmas with the Loved Ones
Many people are separated from their families due to work commitments or political situations, and definitely, living abroad can make reconnecting with a loved one very difficult. Not every job and every employer offers remote options during that season. The wish to be with family during this time can turn the season into a painful reminder of their absence.
2. Financial Barriers
Travelling home for Christmas or hosting a family gathering is not always cheap. Plane tickets, gifts, and even the cost of a holiday meal can strain budgets. The financial pressure can make people feel excluded from the celebrations they long for, especially if they have been affected by redundancy.
3. Grieving a Loss
For those who have lost a loved one, Christmas can be a sorrowful reminder of their absence. Loss of a child, loss of a parent or loss of the relationship The traditions and memories shared with that person may now feel incomplete, leaving an ache that contrasts with the season’s message of joy and togetherness.
4. Going through a difficult time
The festive season can make people who are navigating difficult life transitions, grappling with personal stress, or simply trying to understand themselves feel isolated even more. The pressure to appear joyful can be overwhelming, making it even harder to cope and amplifying feelings of loneliness, stress, or sadness.
5. Navigating infertility treatment
For those who are going through infertility treatment and navigating a difficult way of becoming a parent, not all the parties and activities feel right for them. After going through disappointment during the year, they might not be most excited about them.
Standards of Christmas
Our standards of what makes a great Christmas is often driven by social media and what other people do, which might not be what you need or want. But sometimes a simple holiday season rather than a show is more important.
According to research conducted in December 2023 by the American Heart Association 79% of survey respondents overlook their health needs during the holidays; find the holidays more stressful than tax season.
Navigating Christmas Season
Cancelling plans and not attending some of the Christmas activities and festivities might sound like you will be disappointing to others. But if your emotions feel too difficult to manage during the Christmas season, it’s okay not to attend to them and stay at home. You don’t need to please anyone if navigating through that time is particularly difficult for you.
Feel the autonomy to do so. Give yourself the freedom to change your mind, but let those involved know that you might change your plan, explaining the heaviness that you are feeling.
Not everyone will be open to it, but you can determine who can safely share that information and have control over it. By giving them the message, you meet their expectations. There is no shame in saying now, “You can sit this year out, and the next year might be easier.” Have that freedom to make a decision.
Not doing anything during Christmas this year doesn’t mean you won’t be doing anything next year
Manage your mental and physical capacity and understand what feels helpful and comforting this year. You know your physical and mental capacity and how much you can handle this year.
Respecting your own health and well-being should be a priority for you. Seeking support from friends, joining community events, or reaching out to professionals can make a difference. Volunteering, creating new traditions, or simply permitting yourself to feel your emotions can help you cope with the season’s difficulties.
Christmas is about much more than spending money
At its heart, it’s a time to connect with others, share love, and come together with family and friends. The true meaning of Christmas isn’t about how much money we spend. Overspending on gifts, big dinners, or fancy parties might feel good, but it can lead to financial stress that lasts long after the holidays are over. Instead, focus on creating meaningful experiences and special memories that don’t depend on expensive things. Small gestures, shared time, and heartfelt moments can often mean so much more than anything money can buy.
Reach out to someone who may be struggling
For those who are fortunate enough to feel the joy of Christmas, a little compassion can go a long way. Reach out to someone who may be struggling—it might make their season a bit brighter.